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DB - Animation Thumbnails (v2)

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Description

Hey guys! I'm asking for feedback on my animation project. This is the thumbnail stage (in between the script and the storyboard). Gotta get stuff hammered out! The goal is to end up with animation that is no longer than 2 minutes max.

EDIT (Sat 3/18): Made some minor changes because I'm lazy. Some things I'll address in the storyboard, other things I just didn't change... Version 1 is here for comparison. I'll still take any comments! :eager:

So please give me some general comments, or think about the following: 


  1. Is the story clear? Do the visuals get my point across?
  2. Are there unnecessary parts? Is anything 'feature creeping'? (that is, it looks interesting, but it's detracting from the story) How do I make it concise?
  3. Does it stick to the screenplay? (The screenplay is here for reference, but I copy and pasted like 95% of of the text onto here anyways, so...)
  4. What camera angles am I using? Does it enhance the storytelling?
  5. Does anyone have a better title? DxD..... 

*inserts information about DB later* Using the characters Emily and Derek for this. Probably in the Chain Reaction universe.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

On a final note, 

TODAY (March 15th) IS NIGHTMARESIREN/ANA-DANTE'S BIRTHDAY SO EVERYONE GO WISH HER HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Happy Birthday (2) happy DA B-day :3 10th BirthdAy Bounce x2  

Image size
1981x8778px 4.55 MB
© 2017 - 2024 Sorcaron
Comments14
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Catluckey's avatar
Oh, this was funny! She can't catch a break. You can take out so much of her glancing back and forth at the stop light and her watch. One shot is enough because we get it being late.

Hah! One time when I was in elementary school, I woke up and it was after 8am. I was soooo scared. I rushed, put on my flip-flops (which isn't normal), ran out of the door in my PJ's and a minute later realized it was Saturday (no school)! hahaha! So I really understand this character!